It's Always Gonna Rain
by Team M
Summary: Miley left four years ago for college, leaving everything and everyone behind. Now she's back. Only there's more to her than she's letting everyone see. There's a pain there, a girl who wants out. She's about to find out coming back is harder than leaving
1. Chapter 1

**Four years ago, Miley left.**

_Shows a girl rolling her suitcase in an airport._

**Now she's back, fresh out of college, and ready to start over.**

"_Daddy, I'm going to my office. We have a few interviews to wrap up."_

**She's working for E! News as a reporter now. Out of the spotlight, interviewing people who are in it.**

"_Thank you for your time, Mrs. Lovato. And that wraps up E! News today. Tune in tomorrow to see what Britney's next step is in her career."_

**But what if she runs into the reason why she left?**

"_Miley, you're who we think best fits the job. You're going to interview the Jonas Brothers on why they split."_

**And what if he never forgave her?**

"_Miley, you left just when we got better! I needed you here. I loved you back then. And you just left."_

**There's a good reason why she left though. Only nobody knows.**

_Shows her playing with the rubber band on her wrist._

**It's time for someone to find out, though.**

_Screen flashes with the faces of Taylor, Selena, Demi, Kevin, Nick, Joe, and Mandy._

**It's time for someone to show her that she matters.**

"_Miley Ray, I know I've joked around before, but you best believe if anything ever happened to you I could never forgive myself."_

**Starring:**

**Miley Cyrus.**

"_I should've stayed in Europe. I don't belong here, Dad."_

**Joe Jonas.**

"_You should know better than anyone that there's no such thing as starting over."_

**Nick Jonas.**

"_I hate you, Miley. I despise you. I wish you'd die at this point."_

**Taylor Swift.**

"_You're back... and you love him... and I can't stop you from that..."_

**Well, new story? I dunno, maybe. Do you want it? If you do review (: I'm not sure about this one yet, so it really depends on how many reviews. & you pick....  
**

**Should it be Niley, or Jiley/Moe?  
**


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter One.**

The airport was bigger than I remembered it. Then again, I hadn't been back to California in quite awhile. My dad wouldn't be here to pick me up either. Noah had some interview she had to go to while Mommy was at the hospital with Mammy for her heart issues, and Brandi was in Tennessee. Braison was still in his own college, and Trace was on tour which left me to my only option of getting a cab home. Alone.

All I was praying walking through the airport was that nobody recognized my face. It was the face that mysteriously disappeared four years ago that everyone seemed to have forgotten by now. Then again, who cared now? Only I wasn't famous anymore. Every now and then there was a small skit on me, but other than that people had given up. They'd thought I wouldn't come back which was what I wanted them to think. But they were all wrong.

I'd gone to college for a bachelors in journalism. It wasn't right for me in the Hollywood lifestyle, and to be honest I was about to do something stupid. Rather than turning Britney on the media, I took the easy way out. I went to college in Australia figuring that almost nobody would recognize or look for me there. I was right. The only person who knew what I was going home to was my roommate.

The fact that I had worn a wig with a complete different style make-up and changed my name could have had something to do with nobody knowing who I was. The precautions I took were absurd, but I was fragile, insecure, unsure, that I didn't know what I would do if people found out here too. It was a red wig seeing as black, blond, and highlighted were already seen on me. It looked different, but it was what I would look like for the next four years so I figured I'd get used to it.

I rolled the black decorated suitcase across the tiles of the airport, my head held high. I didn't know what to expect in this new life. Last time there was hardly a break between paparazzi, interviews, photoshoots, concerts, the TV shows or movies I was recording, plus writing songs for a record. Then there was the regular high school drama that was found at any school, only Hollywood style. It started when Selena took Nick. But that was besides the point. We'd all grown up since then, and we weren't teenagers anymore.

Pulling out my phone I called my dad, assuring him that I was home safe and sound on my way to the house now. He was overprotective. Seeing my background I didn't wonder why. I was a wreck a couple years ago who didn't have her priorities straight. Now, though, I'm a young woman who's ready to stand on her own.

The rain was pouring outside in the city. The streetlights gently reflected off of some small puddles that were placed on the sidewalk. For a return the scene was somewhat depressing. I sighed, guessing that this would be my new life. I would have to wait to get a fresh start at everything. Journalism was surprisingly hard, I'd found, and while being in Australia to earn my degree I developed a whole new respect for the media. Maybe not the paparazzi yet, but I'm sure I'd even understand them someday.

The white car stopped next to me, having writing all over it. I gave the driver a small nod before he drove off away from the mansion I was used to. It would be empty this time of day. I knew that before I entered.

It was. I yelled through the house to double check that I was the only one here, and the only response was my echoes bouncing off of the walls.

I pulled out the newest version of my T-Mobile Blackberry, pressing the eight key. Ryan had told me to call him as soon as I'd landed, but we both knew that I wouldn't. I'd call him when I found time, and better yet privacy. Now was the time, here was the privacy.

"Yellow?" Ryan's voice rang through the phone.

"Hey, Ryan. You told me to call when I landed?"

"Right. I just wanted to give you some information on the new job. Pick you up for Coffee Bean in fifteen?" he asked. Ryan being a brother wasn't true. In a brother there are certain things that you can't always tell, and relationships ponder from hate to love. Ryan and I were more like best friends. I nodded.

"Sure," I pressed end, leaning against the large white door that led into my room.

This was harder than I thought it'd be. Leaving was difficult, but returning... that was plain torture. I wasn't used to this place anymore. The way people talked, the busy city, the street lights filling the majority of space, and not being able to see stars. It almost didn't feel like home anymore. I wanted to go back out of the country. Only I didn't know if that was because I didn't want to face everyone again, or because I really did miss it that much.

I sighed, picking myself up to get a move on. I'd left a note explaining where I was, and how I might even be back before they got home. I put the four suitcases I'd somehow managed to get home alone in my room.

Ryan honked his horn outside. I looked out from my bedroom window giving him the one minute sign. He nodded in understanding, giving a soothing smile. I let the curtain fall back into its place, grabbing my favorite Gucci bag, and walked out the door in the skinny jeans I'd been wearing on the flight oversea. I took a deep breath, going outside to walk to the car. Was it safe to be this confused about your own self?

I started to finger with the rubber band around my wrist out of nervous habit. I sat down on the passenger seat of his small black Ford sports car. The air freshener hung from the window, and all the car reminded me of was how blinged out I'd made my car when I was sixteen and had the Hello Kitty floor mats.

"Hey, Honey. How're you doing?" Ryan asked once I got into the car.

"I'm doing good, Ry. How about you?"

He looked into his rearview mirror, beginning to pull out carefully as not to hit the gate. "I'm doing fine, myself. Sure did miss you 'round here."

"Yeah, sorry about that. I knew my dad would keep you updated on everything."

Ryan patted my arm, keeping his eyes focused on the road. "He did, Sweetheart."

I didn't mean if that meant _everything _or everything that was small talk. Everything was a lot to tell him, that was for sure. We were at Coffee Bean in no time, however. I didn't get the chance to over analyze what the words had meant. I had forgotten how short of a time it took to get here, and just how good their coffee tasted. We sat down in a booth, me drinking my latte while he sipped out of the sugared coffee.

"Wait, so are you my boss now?" I cocked my head.

He laughed, giving his goodhearted smile. He'd lost weight since the last time I'd seen him, and began to shave daily again, always making it clean. "No, I'm a coworker. The company just assigned me as the person to teach you what to do."

"Well in that case teach, Teach."

"You need to be at your office by nine. From there, you'll do hair and makeup and a interview if they need you to do an interview. On all interviews that air on TV there's already premade questions," he told me. "If you don't have an interview right away that day, you'll be researching all of these celebrities."

I smiled. "I can do that."

"Tomorrow you have a interview with Lindsey Lohan and if it's fact or fiction that she has a new girlfriend. Then you'll just promote the album and talk to her," he instructed.

"Okay, I-"

"Ryan!" a voice exclaimed from behind me. It was unusually high pitched telling me exactly who it was. Her blue eyes pierced me every night before I went to sleep, and I woke up to them each morning as they taunted me. I didn't bother to turn around to face her. I already heard the heels walking across the shop. That was enough.

"Hey, Mandy. Hey, Demi," he grinned, shooting me a sympathetic look. I pulled strands of hair up to hide my face.

"Who's your friend?" Demi asked politely.

"This is actually a new coworker I'll be working with for E!," he nodded at me. We'd never discussed it before, but he knew that I didn't want anyone to know where I'd left to, or when I came back. It was confidential.

"Be right back," I told him going to the girls restroom. What were they doing here? I locked a stall, going in it to hide how stressed I was. I rested my elbow on my knees, putting my head on my hand. In the past five years, I couldn't help but wonder how I'd gone from brave tween queen to a scared little girl who locked herself in the bathroom.

Someone came into the bathroom, but after doing what they had to the door creaked again to signal that they left. I let out a breath. If I didn't go back soon Ryan would think I left, leaving me here to find a ride home. I walked out of the stall to the sink, waving my hands under the sink. Getting soap I looked in the mirror to view my reflection.

That's when I saw what was behind me. I blinked a couple times, freezing stiff. My hand was on the lever of the soap, and I was terrified to put any pressure on it as if time might stop. I didn't know if we were friends, enemies, or simple strangers. At this point I would understand either one of them. Not only did I leave, but in her eyes I died. After going talking what I'd done through, I realized how many mistakes I'd made. If I could go back, I would tell her in an instant. She _deserved_ to know. I would give her a fair goodbye, and tell others' that I'd left. Still, I'd leave, but I'd do it the right way.

I opened my mouth to speak, but nothing came out. I took a deep breath, closing it. "What are you doing here?"

I directed my attention to washing my hands. Things weren't the same anymore. I'd heard she was married, but really that's about it. I stopped reading the gossip sites after not knowing what was true drove me insane. I couldn't do it without being able to call them up. I couldn't see them continue to live their lives without me, or speak out on my disappearance.

Once their faces slowly started to pop up on the Yahoo home page with the bold headlines I used to have I stopped going on that. Soon enough I was restricted to sites that my sister went on back when she was eight. There was no point in going online anymore. Eventually I gave up on the computer, checking my e-mail once a day, then getting off. If I had to type a paper I'd do that. Otherwise, I was too much of a coward to face the machine.

I started to fix my hair in the mirror trying to focus solely on my reflection. It wasn't messed up, at all. In fact, every strand was perfectly placed still from the hairspray I'd used that morning, but it gave me something to do. "I'm back."

"How long?" her voice was cold, sounding bored.

"Does it really matter to you? You don't care, so why do you ask?" I turned around. Our eyes met, neither one of us having the will to back down.

After a few minutes of dead silence I sighed. "Exactly."

I brushed past her shoulder, feeling like a jerk while I blew her off. In another sense, she shouldn't have asked. I knew that she should have - Mandy has that right, she was my best-friend for four years, and the best best-friend at that. I could trust her, I could love her, I could hurt her... I could leave her. And I chose the latter. Therefore, Mandy had every right to ask. Except I had every right to push her away if I was afraid. That's what I did, because it was the thing I'd become best at. Pushing people away.

**I t ' s A l w a y s G o n n a R a i n . . . **

Ryan drove me home in silence. We passed the bridge over the highway, the forest, the lake, even my old studio, then finally reached the big house I used to call home. There was a car in the driveway as he drove into the gate, and about fifty cameras were waiting for my sister to step foot outside.

She had taken my place. I was aware that she'd been my real, official replacement. It wasn't Demi or Selena, but Noah Cyrus. Her name was flashed across every website, with hundreds of fan mail she had to catch up on. I couldn't have thought of a better replacement for me than her.

The car was put in park and Ryan unlocked the doors. I was about to get up when he gently laid his hand on my thin arm. I stopped, turning to face him curiously at why I couldn't go inside to my house.

He sighed, "Things can't be the same for you."

"I know. Magic only works one time around, right?" I tried to plaster on a smile, but with myself being unsure of the words I was saying, I could hardly pull off that the fact didn't bother me.

"Your friends have changed. I'm not gonna lie, most are mad at you for leaving. A couple understand, then there's the selected few that you kept in touch with, but they won't ever treat you the same, Miley," he lectured.

I faced down towards his floor mats, "I know."

"Okay," his arm rubbed small circles on my arms. "I just wanted to make sure."

I nodded, getting out of the car. I walked up the pavement, looking back once more to wave Ryan off. He waved back with a goodhearted glint in his eye. I pushed the door open to reveal my father sitting in the kitchen on his Macbook.

His head snapped up as he quickly pushed his chair away to come greet me. His muscular arms didn't hesitate to wrap around my small body. I returned the hug, trying to make up for the past four years. "I'm so glad you're back, baby."

"I'm happy too, Dad. I missed you guys." He needed reassurance. I'd been able to tell that he wondered if I was coming back for him, or for myself. He hoped that it was both, yet even I couldn't give him the answer to that.

His body turned away from me over to the staircase, calling down Noah.

She ran down the stairs, and we immediately gave each other hugs. Her hair was died dark enough that I couldn't tell if it was meant to be black or a shade of brown. Her bangs were pulled back by a single clip, letting the front of her hair perfectly frame her face. It was all neatly straightened instead of her natural curls. I couldn't help being a little jealous of how beautiful she was.

Seeing how much make-up she wore didn't help the situation either. There was a natural colored blush as eyeshadow with eyeliner marked across the bottom in a straight line. She had on a thin film of lip gloss, and her smile was gorgeous. It was no wonder how she was a tween sensation.

"Missed ya, Kiddo," I laughed. "Look at you! You're so pretty, Noie."

"Thanks, Miles. You look great, too," she smiled genuinely. "How was Australia?"

"It was good," I grazed over her body for a last time, trying to look for one flaw. Between her Converse and the roots of her hair there wasn't a single that I could find. "I learned a lot of valuable lessons that I should have known from the start."

"I'm glad. Sounds like it was very worthwhile," she singsonged. She looked out the window. "Wanna go for a walk? Talk about things or whatever."

"I really don't wanna be recogn-"

"Believe me, after a year of disappearance the neighbors finally believed you weren't coming back. They aren't staring out at streets for you anymore," she gazed at me with a blank haze. I nodded, looking down.

There was the darkness of disappointment as the devil began to rush over, even jealous for my sister occurring. Did they miss me at all? Then it was brightened by thinking how I could finally be _normal_. Something I thrived for here in America. Without a wig, without dying my hair, I wanted to go out to a park, swing on a swing, and not be photographed. Or feel the cool breeze pull my hair back while I rode a bike without having to worry about not falling from running into one of the cars that were following me around.

"Then, yeah. If it's okay with-"

"It's fine, Babygirl. Your day today."

Noah grabbed my hand gently, leading me back out into the fresh air. The sun was beginning to set. The colors above us all mixed together with fine shades of purples, blues, pinks, reds, yellows, and oranges. She led me out to the gate, peeking over to check for possible paparazzi.

She furrowed her eyebrows, softly biting her lip at the same time answered my question. She wanted this quality time more than anything – we hadn't had it in four years, after all – yet had a feeling that I wouldn't go. She kicked a pebble on the driveway.

"We don't have to go if you don't wanna. I understand," the way she did it all made me see the same eleven year old girl I'd left instead of the strong fifteen year old woman she was.

I peeked over the gate. "No, I want to."

Her head snapped up. "There's paparazzi," she warned.

"I know," I grinned. "I want to, Noie. We never get quality time and," I took a deep breath trying to digest the thought myself. "they're gonna find out I'm here eventually, right?"

She nodded, opening the gate. There were immediately flashes going off, but as soon as they saw who was beside her they stopped yelling, stopped taking pictures, and all just stood there. This was exactly what they all needed to get a raise, yet they were all to shocked to press a button. As if that button could end the world, or make me disappear into thin air they didn't press it.

Noah grabbed my hand, leading me to the sidewalk in the same motions I used to do to her when she was eight and I was fifteen. Now she was fifteen and I was twenty-two, yet one of us still need guidance.

They turned to us, starting to follow, all of the sudden doing anything they could to get proof.

"MILEY!" they all shouted. I looked to Noah, feeling bad that I took her spotlight. Honestly she looked glad. I could see why she was, too. It was one of the multiple combined reasons I had moved away.

I gave them my all so famous peace sign I used to be known for. They went crazy until I turned around to my sister, beginning to talk to her about what was recently going on in her own life. The flashes continued to light up everything around us, though.

When we got home that night, I opened up my laptop going onto the real internet sites for the first time in three years. I started with OceanUp, scrolling down to check up on the names. I clicked Selena's first, then Taylor's, seeing the latest rumors. Then I clicked the people I really needed to check up on like the Jonas'.

After it all, just when I was about to close the window for the night and finish it all up tomorrow, the names list got bigger. There, in the middle of all the names exactly in its old place was 'Miley Cyrus'.

I clicked on it with hesitation. The old posts were all there along with the new ones. For the first time in two years they posted something about me. For the first time in six years, I read the comments. For the first time in eight years, _I didn't cry when I read them._

**So, I know, lame first chapter right? But this is more of an... introduction? So, do you guys still want this? Or no? I can do either :D just let me know. Reviews would help discover your answer :D **


	3. Chapter 3

**I t ' s A l w a y s G o n n a R a i n . . . **

"I'll be in my office, Daddy!" I yelled up the stairs to him. "We have a few interviews to wrap up. Be home before dinner!"

"'Kay, Bud. Take your time," he shouted down.

"Don't forget; Selena's coming over later," I replied running out to try and be on time. It was only the middle of my first week with a real job that I could easily lose, and the last thing I needed was to be fired.

I walked out to my new car. I'd gotten it last week after discovering that four busy people – three of them working – sharing two cars when they all had to be different places didn't work. The first Saturday I was back in L.A. I had my Dad drop me off at the car dealership on his way to bring Noah to the Jonas'.

It was a small silver Honda. The windows were tinted, with one door on each side. There was a new model of a GPS navigator that should work for a few years that was pre-installed directly below the top of the dashboard . The car should last me for at least eight years, I figured.

On my way into the large building I applied a fresh coat of lipgloss before pressing the button on the elevator. I looked down at the papers in my hand.

**Jackson Brundage:**

**Age; Fifteen**

**Current Roles; Heartbreaking (New movie – releasing December 22), Recurring role on Simply Jackson (Series)**

**Main Question;**

**Is he dating Madison Lovato?**

**Sub Questions;  
**

**Would he date Madison?**

**Who is he dating?**

Madison... That was Demi's little sister. I remember Demi and I would sometimes sneak her into our sleepovers if we were bored in order to have someone to talk to. She'd eat with us, and laugh with us, tell us stories of her elementary school drama that we wished we could go back and deal with.

Demi was one of my two best friends directly before I left. We weren't best friends for long, but we were closer than anyone I've ever known. Closer than Mandy, closer than Joe, closer than Taylor – everyone. Nick was the only one who tied with her. That's a different story though.

There were pictures paperclipped to the stack of papers. It started with some recent sightings before it got into leaked pictures of the couple. They were all rated G, however.

Looking at Madison she hadn't changed much. She still had the baby face with the cheeky smile. She slimmed out, and I could picture her and Noah strutting down the streets together for shopping sprees. Her dark hair was grown out with what I guessed to be fake extensions.

I walked in, the woman behind the desk smiling at me. "Hello."

"Hi, Melany. How are you today?"

"Great, how about you?"

I stuffed my things into my handbag as I quickly paced inside. "Great!"

The room was busy, filled with people walking around. The Jackson that I used to watch on One Tree Hill occasionally was now grown, not to mention toned out. His muscles were revealed after the sleeve of his Hollister T-shirt stopped. The smile he was known for was just as handsome, only straighter, whiter, and sexier.

Three publicists were coaching him on what to say to whatever I may ask. It didn't matter what I said, the answer would be a rehearsed line. The cameras were set up in the perfect angle in order to capture the entire interview, watching every expression for a flinch, an odd blink, a quirky grin, _anything_.

I asked what I needed to, making up some questions to not make it too obvious what this interview was about. His answer to the main question was no. It's exactly what everyone expected. There was no reason for him to admit any truth. There wasn't anything special about one interview compared to another.

Before heading home I double checked with Selena that she was still coming, changing into my regular clothes that consisted of a tank-top with skinny jeans. She said she wouldn't miss seeing me for the first time in years for anything.

Selena and I... we weren't always friends. In fact, most of the time that I was here we were the farthest thing from it. We were _enemies_. She didn't steal my man like they all believed back then. She fixed him. Which in my eyes was almost worst. That was my job. We fought, he got depressed, I fixed him, we got back together. It was all in a day's process, and everyone knew that. She knew it too, but she interfered with the cycle, throwing it off.

She fixed Nick, and as much as I would like to deny it, fixing Nick broke me. A week later they were going out, and what could I do other than sit there in pain, my heart being ripped to shreds, then the shreds being ripped all over? He was moving on from me. And fast. But if that made him happy then I was happy. But it ruined our friendship. She knew that she'd betrayed me.

Towards the end of my teenage years, months before I left, I talked to Nick again for the first time in a year. Not a fake publicity talk, but a real talk. Slowly we started to become friends again. Then I saw the love we had in his eyes, and the reflection of mine. It was scary. I didn't want to love him, or rip him away from Selena. I knew what that felt like, and to be honest, I didn't have the right. Selena was beautiful. Both prettier, and nicer than I was. She _deserved _him.

That's when I left. My phone was flooded with calls from all sorts of numbers of friends who had never before used my number. Their names would pop up on the screen, then each time I would press 'Ignore', wanting to cry.

Until her number popped up. It was unknown, showing eleven unrecognized digits which wasn't normal. I didn't hesitate to pick it up – what if it was my parents calling me to warn me of something? Or it was an emergency? Therefore I picked it up immediately.

She explained to me at that time how he used her. How she didn't mean anything. How sorry she was that she even _tried_ to stop our love. She explained how she knew we still loved each other, and that she couldn't interfere. She explained how she had always loved him while Nick and I were dating, and all she wanted was to experience the same luxury of Love that I did. Only from what I was hearing in her speech that, luxury never happened.

Then somewhere between explanations, she became my best friend.

She was sobbing so I joined her, telling her how much of a mistake I made by leaving while she assured me if that's what my heart told me to do it was right. After I told her what was happening with me, she agreed not to tell. From that day on we've called each other everyday. My name was stored as 'Hannah M.' in her contacts to avoid discovery of our secret relationship, and apparently it worked because people still don't know.

I got home fifteen minutes preceding her arrival, swiftly entering through my private door. There were voices downstairs that I didn't really care about. My sister mentioned something about inviting her friend and his family over today. I was more concerned about tidying up my room for visitors. In the past week I've lived here I managed to have a good load and a half of laundry with wrappers of food on the floor.

Thirteen and a half minutes later the doorbell rang all through the huge house I was in. I ran down the stairs, skipping the last – which I was probably too old to be doing – and jumping off. I pulled the door open, embracing her immediately. We swayed together before separating and giggling.

"Hey," she singsonged.

"Let's go," I pulled on her wrist, running to my room.

In the corner of my eye I saw my parents, sitting talking to two of their friends. My mom was standing next to the pot that was placed on the burner. From what I could tell she was making spaghetti with her homemade meatballs.

"Hi, Mrs. Cyrus," Selena called as we ran up.

"Hi, Selena," my mom said, full of love.

I raised my eyebrow after my door was shut, "You know my mom?"

She gave me a face, wrinkling her forehead. "No. I just know what she looks like and thought it'd be the polite thing to say hello to the woman who's giving me free food!"

"You're an odd little human," I teased, sitting on my large bed. She came over, yelling and tackling me which only brought us to minutes of unstoppable laughter, her on top of me. I struggled to get out until she fell off.

"Why is the Jonas' car here, anyways?" she got out between breaths. That's when my laughter cut off. Nothing was funny anymore. I took deep breaths while she calmed herself seeing she was laughing alone. "They aren't here, are they?"

"I don't think so. I-I hope not," I let out a shaky breath. "They might be, though... Do you want to go get my sister?"

"Ha ha, no. That's something for _you_ to do. If the Jonas' are there, I'm the one who runs across the interstate to get away," she huffed, lying back.

The small phone on bedside caused us both to grin simultaneously. "Hello, Technology. You are my new best friend."

Selena grabbed it, skimming down to Noah's name in my contacts. Her big brown eyes met mine to double check that it was okay to call her. I nodded in agreement, because otherwise we'd both never know until dinner was ready and we were all seated. By then it'd be too late to run away from them.

She tapped the touchscreen to call her, then put it on speaker. At first it was only ringing multiple times, causing me to doubt she would answer until her girly voice popped up to fill the room. I stopped holding my breath, ready to ask.

"Hey," she giggled.

"Noie, are the Jonas' in my house?"

There was silence. "Technically," she said slowly. Selena and I both knew what that meant. "it isn't your house."

"Girl, you better answer your sister's question straight up," Selena cut in with wide eyes. They were filled with terror – something I wasn't used to. Selena was strong, and brave. Before now I didn't think she was actually _scared_ of anything. Maybe nervous, or apprehensive, but never scared.

"Okay, yes -"

"Come to my room, please," I demanded through gritted teeth, trying to contain my tears. "Now."

"I-"

"Noah. Now."

There was a sigh before the Blackberry switched to my background of me with my friends, Chloe and Sarah. I was in the middle while they surrounded me on each side. Sarah held the camera up to capture the picture, a huge smile on all of our faces to make it look like we were having the time of our lives. At the time we all were.

Noah was up in three minutes flat, apologizing for taking so long. While waiting there was complete silence in my room. Both of us didn't know what to say, or how to react. These were the boys that disliked us with a passion. Selena didn't like them a bit either. It wasn't ideal to be sharing a room, and I was positive some would doubt that it's possible for the five of us to be in the same building - it didn't matter how big it was.

"I'm sorry," she blurted as the first two words. Her face showed how panicked she was.

"Why the hell didn't you tell me they were going to be here?" I hissed quietly. Selena sat back on the couch staring at us, not knowing whether she had the right to yell at my family or not.

"Because I knew you wouldn't come!" she sighed biting her lip. "I really wanted to have a family dinner now that everyone's here. Braison's back for summer, Trace is back from tour, then Brandi's leaving tomorrow again to go back with Sam in Nashville... this is the only chance we've had in _four years _to all eat one dinner together."

"Go back ahead," I motioned down to the boys. "We'll talk about it later. They'll wonder where you are soon."

"I really am sorry. I didn't know it was such a big deal to you guys," she looked down.

"It's fine, Noie," I softly shut the door turning to Selena. "You can leave if you want to."

Her eyes widened. "You don't want to leave with?"

"Of course I want to, but I can't!" I explained sitting on the bed. "My sister deserves to have a family dinner again. I always had it as I was growing up. Plus my Mom is cooking my favorite meal. She'd feel terrible if I left."

Selena's eyes met mine. "Then I guess we're staying."

"You're gonna?"

"Miley, if you are, I am. As I said, I'm not missing out on seeing you for the first time in years. And I kinda meant I wanted to see you for more than five minutes when I said that," she giggled. "Plus, you have to have someone to talk to during dinner, right? I'm your best friend, Mile. It's my job to do this stuff... no matter how much I don't want to."

**well, ta-da. second chapter... I'm sick ): which sucks because we had our lock in at the YMCA today for school. and of course I went to school & was fine, but now NOPE! I'm sick. Lol. I love my body.... well, anyways, hope you enjoy this. How was it? **

**-M.  
**


	4. Chapter 4

**I t ' s A l w a y s G o n n a R a i n . . . **

"Girls, dinner's ready," my mom came in to tell us. I nodded, telling her that we'd be right down.

Exchanging glances with Selena I knew that we both didn't want to be here. We both wanted to run, and we both didn't want to see them. The two of us each feared the feelings that we held for them. Only they were two complete opposites.

Selena feared the hatred that we both knew she felt. She didn't like the brothers at all. Each one of them she disliked with a passion. And I knew why, too. I'd been in her shoes before, and she has a right to hate them.

Then me, well, I have the completely different problem. I love them. All three, but one certain Jonas in particular – and no, it isn't Frankie. I love them too much, and I was scared of watching them hate me.

We walked down together as Selena made small jokes that let me giggle a little, but hardly. Braison was seated already, his hair cut short and spiked. I grinned at him a little, and he smiled back, patting the seat next to him. I nodded. Selena and I went to sit down beside him, facing the front of the kitchen and away from the basement door. I was in the middle of all of us.

"Hi, Mrs. Jonas," I smiled shyly seeing her standing by my Mom across from me, wondering if she was seeing things again. "Hey, Mr. J."

"Hi," she said sort of dazed.

Brandi came inside from the backyard two minutes later, her cell phone in hand. She'd no doubt been talking to her boyfriend of six years. Why they weren't married yet was beyond me, but it really wasn't any of my business. **(A/N: Sounds like my older sister.)**

My mom went up to the basement door, shouting for Noah to come up. She sighed stubbornly, leading her and the Jonas clan up the stairs loudly. Selena began talking to me to keep herself busy when they came up.

It didn't work however, because as soon at they entered the room and Joe caught my eye he stopped dead in his tracks causing the other three people behind him to stop. Noah however kept moving to hop on the counter as her place. Two of us always sat on the counter while the Jonas' we here, and now that I thought of it I was wondering why I hadn't sat there with Selena.

Frankie dug his way out of the back to sit by Noah. I barely heard him whisper something about me in her ear, but it wasn't anything bad. I kept staring at Joe, not having the nerve to move past him. The two pairs of eyes in back of him would be so much worse. One of them would be glaring with nothing but hate, and well, I wanted to keep the image of loving eyes in my memories otherwise I'd officially break.

Joe was – as he always used to be – the first to talk.

"_Miley_?" he asked in disbelief. I was positive I hadn't changed at all however, so he was simply doing that because he had no idea why I was actually here. He'd thought I left for good. Nobody had told him that – or anyone else for that matter. They assumed it, and now they were all one-by-one finding out their assumptions were wrong. When I left it was more like a vacation. A long one, but a vacation all the same.

I couldn't manage to say anything. I could hardy order myself to nod, but luckily I was able to after a couple seconds. Selena pulled my arm to break the gaze. Even though I was talking to her – only half into the conversation – I knew that the three of them were still staring. Nick's eyes, well, they were staring at the both of us wondering what the hell life had come to.

"Your back."

I slowly turned to see if Nick was seriously talking to me after all I put him through. His eyes didn't flinch at all. I nodded slowly.

He shook his head, letting his disappointment in me show in the colors of his eyes. "When are you leaving?"

"I...I'm not," I told him confidently through my fear.

His face changed for a split second before he went back to hiding all emotion. "That's too bad," he muttered under his breath. I was positive that I wasn't supposed to hear it, but I did. I bit my lip quickly grabbing the Pepsi that was sitting in front of me to stop the annoying tears from coming.

"Rubberband," Selena whispered into my ear. I put down the glass, nodding. Underneath the table I started to flick the rubberband that was around my wrist.

"Thanks," I mumbled. "Needed that."

"C'mon, let's go get spaghetti," she motioned her head to the pot that was seated on the stove for everyone to serve themselves with.

She led me up while she served herself some. I gave myself a large fork full of the noodles next before turning to get a meatball. Selena gave me a skeptical look at the proportion, but I had to stay at least content with myself. It took four years, and I'm barely passing. I couldn't lose that, or else I would be back to the beginning.

"Two meatballs?" she begged.

I grabbed another to make her happy. She gave me a one armed hug to keep her plate balanced on her hand. "Thank you."

"Only for you," I smirked.

She smiled back at me, laughing enthusiastically. If there was one thing I missed about LA it was the people that were here. They'd all shaped me into who I was – both good things and bad things about me.

I walked around the kitchen to sit back down, not bothering to wait for Selena while she loaded her spaghetti with spoons of sauce. By the time she finished it was a huge red puddle on top of the noodles.

This was when Trace walked down without a shirt, letting his tattoos look like one. There were more than when I left. When he told me he'd added some I thought he was kidding. Where else could he put them? But sure enough they went down to the middle of his back and stopped on the last ab he had in front.

I smiled at him, searching for my name in the pile of pictures. It took awhile, but I found it, placed directly in the center of everything in light blue cursive. MILEY was printed rather big for a little sister.

"Like it?" Trace asked knowing exactly where my eyes were placed. He hadn't seen me in awhile, and whenever he missed me at night he'd supposedly trace over the name until he could finally fall asleep. I never confirmed whether that was him sucking up or if it was true. We did miss each other, however. That was a fact.

I nodded my head, feeling as if the two of us were little kids again and he drew me a new picture. "It's... big."

"Well, you're a pretty big part of my life," he chuckled.

I blushed, picking at my food. "It's okay to take a compliment, you know?" Selena pointed out.

"I know," I defended myself. "I take them all the time."

"Dude, Sarah got her hair cut," Braison announced randomly, looking at his phone. He showed us the picture that was displayed on the screen. Her blond hair now barely passed the shoulders when it was pin straight. It used to reach lower back. Braison stared at his phone for a second. "She's so pretty."

"Aw," Selena cooed while I "ew" in disgust. "You like Sarah?"

"They're dating," I heard myself flatly. It didn't matter how long they dated, watching them get gushy with each other was still awkward.

"No way! How long?"

"Three months," I gave her a skeptic look. "How did you not know that?"

"I'm yelling at Sarah later," she growled. "Stupid friends..." She muttered.

"Dude, his girlfriend is hot," Trace did one of his "guyshakes" with Braison while he picked up his plate. "You scored, Man."

I winced. "Guys! This is my best friend."

"I got this, Miles," Brandi winked, smacking Trace upside the head. I grinned until I notice that Joe and Kevin – while continuing to whisper about something – were still staring at me. Or glaring, either one, really.

"At least we're not saying she's ugly," Trace said, earning another smack on the head.

"Trace, shut up while you can," I giggled.

"Gosh, you guys are such teenagers," Frankie broke in. I playfully flicked the rubberband that was around my wrist at him, laughing.

Nick glared at me. "_Don't _throw things at my little brother," he scowled.

The smile quickly wiped off. I rubbed my arm nervously. "Nick, lay off. It was a joke," Frankie cut in. Nick looked back and forth between us. The only noise heard being laughter from the parents in the room next door.

I turned to Selena, subtly tapping the rubberband on her wrist. She took it off silently, giving it to me. "Thanks," I whispered, before silently scolding myself for not staying where I belong.

**chapter threee. (:  
So I wasn't sure. Was that good, or a little confusing? Let me know. & Any opinions on Before the Storm? I'll be sure to reply if you'd like to start a conversation on it. Because I obviously need a life other than obsessing over a teenage couple. Lol. Reviews? Please? **

**IloveFF. Thought I'd say that.  
**


	5. Chapter 5

**I t ' s A l w a y s G o n n a R a i n . . . **

"Congratulations," Selena smiled at me as we cleared the "kids" table. We were all young adults, yet we didn't fail to be separated from the adults. Maybe because we spent so much time splitting up when we were younger, or maybe – just a possibility – but even our parents knew enough to stay away from us because s_omething _would happen at dinner.

I wrinkled my eyebrows at her in confusion. "What'd I do?"

"You didn't..." she trailed off, putting down the last plate she was carrying in the sink before extending her wrist and running her finger across it.

"I wanted to though," I pointed out.

"Still, you didn't. Congrats."

I sat down next to her on the wide counter, and stared at the wall. "It's nothing to be proud of."

"Yeah it is, Mi."

"I didn't cut myself, Selena. So what?" I snapped.

Her voice rose to match mine, but we both made sure it couldn't travel to other rooms. "You didn't cut yourself in a bad situation. A few months ago that would've been the first thing you'd do and you know it!"

"I still thought about it, though," I pointed out trying to prove my point. "I still wanted to. It took everything I had plus you to remind me to use the rubber band trick for me to not excuse myself and make another tiny, priceless, painfreeing mark."

"But you didn't," she pressed. We both sat there silent. "Is the urge going away at all?"

"Not at all," I played with my fingers. "I want so badly to give up."

"Don't!" she pounced. "You've come so far. And I'm going to help you, Miley! We'll get through this just like we got through the Nick situation four years ago."

I sighed looking down. "You have a big job, Selena." We both knew it was the truth. "You have to take care of someone who can barely take care of herself. I'm emo, and insecure, and used to be bilemic. I'm pretty messed up, and if you – if you knew some of the thoughts that went through my head, you'd be so disappointed. I'm not like other people... I'm not like all your other best friends."

She tilted my head up to meet her eyes. They were desperate for me to stop thinking that, but I always would. I knew how different I was. How fragile I was.

"My egg's a little more cracked than others, so what? It's still the best egg in the dozen," she smiled.

"Did you just compare me to an egg?" Selena laughed and it didn't take me long to follow. It was contagious. "I love you, Sel."

"Right back at chya'. And, by the way, you're my _only _best friend," she grinned like a child. "I'll always be right here, Miley," she giggled. "All you gotta do is turn around, close your eyes, look-"

"Stop it!" I squealed.

She hopped off the counter, spinning around to face me again. "It's the truth!"

"You're really proud? Just 'cause I didn't cut myself?"

"Yes!" she exclaimed. "I am proud, Miley. Because you could have, you would have, you wanted to, and yet, you _didn't_."

I felt a smile break through. "I honestly think I would've if it weren't for you."

"But I was here, and I always will be."

I nodded. "You did it again, Lena."

"Did what?"

"Whenever I feel depressed or like I have to get something sharp, you know exactly what to say to make me wonder why I thought it in the first place."

"It's what friends do," she gave me a hug. I hung on to her, needing someone to hold. "Especially friends who can't lose someone special."

And out of the corner of my eye I watch Kevin slowly creep back up the stairs after listening to the whole conversation, and it took three seconds to regret ever having the conversation. He had heard it all, and we both knew that.

* * *

"Ms. Cyrus, today you will be interviewing The Jonas Brothers on why they split," my boss instructed me, handing me the papers to study in hair and makeup.

"I don't think that's such a great-"

"Miley, be professional," she got into her lecture again. "You're working for one of the biggest networks in the world. Your pay is great, the office you got is wonderful – don't complain. If you want to keep this job all personal aspects must be put away."

I nodded, staring into her merciless brown eyes. Her red hair was framed perfectly around her face, and she had freckles all over, yet she still looked stunning. The dark purple suit she was wearing was flattened out and wrinkle-free while she held her mug perfectly in her left hand while she took notes with her right.

"Yes, Ma'am."

I left her office, heading down to the studio to get prepared.

**Jonas Brothers**

**Age: 22, 26, 27**

**Current Roles: None.**

**Questions: Why are you splitting up?**

**Who's idea was it to split?**

**Joe; are you and Taylor really getting married?**

Married? When did they get back together. Taylor was holding a grudge on him for two years before I left, and I didn't expect them to say another word. Now there's rumors of _marriage_?

I sighed to myself. Never before had I regretted leaving more. I not only missed watching my sister grow up from a tiny eleven year old girl to sixteen, but I missed my best friends all transform into adults.

My eyes slipped shut to stop the tears, needing to remain strong in public.

"Are you okay, Miley?" Simba, my hairdresser asked carefully. I didn't bother to answer. I'd let him think I fell asleep in the chair.

"Miley?" Kevin asked cautiously bringing me out of my daze. "What are you doing here?"

I blinked at him a couple times. "I-I work here."

"Oh. Do you know who's interviewing us?"

I froze, taking a few seconds to regain my composure. "Me?" It sounded like a question, not an answer.

"You're... the interviewer?" he laughed in disbelief, shaking his head. "Go figure."

My eyes fixed on the mirror that showed our reflection. I hesitated to ask the question, but knew that if I was interviewing them I had to know the answer. "So did you tell your brothers?"

"About?"

"I know you know. I'm not an idiot, I saw you walking back downstairs when me and Selena were done having a _private _conversation a couple weeks ago," I sighed. "Did you tell your brothers is all I want to know."

"Nope," he popped the end of the word.

I turned around to stare him down. It was hard to read his emotions after not having to for so long. "Why not?"

"Eh, figured you can," he shrugged nonchalantly.

"I sense hostility between the four of us. Therefore, I'm not talking to them. I wasn't talking to you either until you decided to eavesdrop," I shot at him standing up with my Starbucks in one hand, papers in the other.

He looked me hard in the eye. "I should be the one mad at you."

"So you go and be mad at me, _Jonas_. I'd rather that than deal with your drama," I said beginning to walk away down the hall. He stepped in front of me, not allowing any way out.

"I'm trying to be your friend."

"And why is that?" I snapped. "Because you know I cut myself or do you feel sorry for me because back here I'm hated?"

He threw his hands up. "Maybe I just miss your friendship."

"And I missed yours – I won't lie. That doesn't change the fact that we can't be friends."

"And why can't we, exactly?"

"The world is against, Kevin. Do you not see that? Your brothers, your fans, the paparazzi. Not to mention your family hates me and... and blood is thicker than water! I'm not standing in between you and your family!"

"There was a point when you were family!"

There was silence after that. My eyes slowly teared, creating my vision to blur. We both knew it was true, and we both knew that Nick was going to propose to me the day before I left. I twisted the ring that I had meant to take off earlier. It was the promise ring he gave me years ago. Kevin glanced down, seeing it as well.

Once I could trust my voice I sighed, trying to keep it sounding steady. "That was then, Kevin... This is now."

**so, now you all know why she's obsessed with rubberbands... If you didn't get it she's using the rubberband trick to refrain from cutting herself.**

**BUT on an AWESOME note, I'm nominated for the NJK awards!! I'm not sure who nominated me but THANK YOUU to whoever did(: This story isn't nominated, but We Meet Again is nominated for Best Niley.**

**Then I'm up for BEST NEW AUTHOR?!?!?!? I'm still amazed at that. Wow. I'm so happy just to be nominated! I know i wont win, but I'm against my favorite author for that which is like, amazingg(: I'm happy.**

**Reviews are appreciated.... :D**

**ohh, and this chapter is dedicated to toastyenchilada. For stalking me until I posted this chapter. Just kidding, but seriously, thanks for all the reviews telling me to post :D The chapter wouldn't be posted if it weren't for all of your many reviews.  
**


	6. Chapter 6

**I t ' s A l w a y s G o n n a R a i n . . . **

Finally the three star Jonas' were all sitting across from me. The cameras were rolling, the lighting on. It was time to do the biggest acting job yet.

"Why did you guys split up the band?" I questioned.

"Well, we all wanted different things. Like, Nick wanted to act. Joe wants to stay singing, and I want to go into producing," Kevin answered me quickly before Nick could show how witty he was.

"Who's Idea was it to split?" I asked, faking concern.

"Mine," Joe spoke up. "Nick lost a lot of his inspiration, along with Kevin who's always been more comfortable working behind the scenes. My therapy was still singing though, and I didn't want to hold them back."

"Now last but not least. Joe. Are you getting married to Taylor Swift?" I tried to keep my suspenseful voice that I had heard so may times when I was getting interviewed.

I saw Ryan directly backstage past Nick's head. He subtly gave me a thumbs up, smiling at me for reassurance.

_(Flashback)_

_ "Are you in love with Nick Jonas?" Ryan asked me back when I was fifteen.  
"I am not in love with Nick Jonas!"  
"Is he in love with﻿ you?"  
"Yes."  
"Have you made out with him?"  
"No."  
"Will you make out with him?"  
"Yes."_

**_------__--_**

_ "Are you dating... Miley Cyrus?"  
"No."_

_ ..._

_ "Now the follow up; Why aren't you dating Miley Cyrus?" It was Nick's turn to be challenged._

_"You know in the past we haven't really been touring together so it's been, like, distance and all that."_

_ "How 'bout fifty-six dates coming up together?"_

_ "That's what I'm saying," he spoke in the voice of a fallen teenager._

_ "Is there a potential there?"_

_ He hesitated. "I think there is."_

**_--------_**

_ "She's our best friend, but she's also insane!" Joe laughed._

**_--------_**

_ "Okay, it is not even that big a deal AND no one knows if we were ever together so how could we break up if we were never even together?"_

**_--------_**

**_ *These interviews haven't happened*_**

_ "You and Nick have been spotted around a lot lately..."_

_ "We're just friends, chillin'. I mean, he's always been one of my best friends, and I'm glad we could get it back."_

**_--------_**

_ "Nick," Ryan sighed heavily. "I want the truth now." There were stifled laughs from his two brothers. "Are you dating Miley Cyrus again?"_

_ "Uh, we're close buds."_

_ "Are you dating her, though?"_

_ "Right now we're just close friends hanging out. She's really an amazing girl and I'm open to whatever the future may bring."_

**_--------_**

_ "Jonas' are in the studio on Kiis. Now, Nick, there's a very important question I was told to ask you."_

_ "Oh really," there was humor in Joe's voice._

_ "Are you in love with Miley Cyrus?"_

_ "Um..." he hesitated, deciding to choose his answer carefully. "Yeah. I am."_

_**--****------**_

_"Miley - are you dating Nick Jonas? I mean, you're both eighteen now, ready for a serious relationship..."_

_"Uh... We're friends. That's the most important thing right now._

**--------**

_ "Let me ask you three the question that's been in the air lately. I'm sure you'd know," Ryan said goodhearted. "Where is Miley Cyrus?"_

_ There was silence for a few seconds before Nick spoke up, his voice sadder than any of them had ever heard it before. Still, there was no anger. "I... I don't know to be honest with you, but I hope she comes back from wherever she is 'cause we all miss her."_

_--_

"Ya never know," He tensed up, putting on that gorgeous smile that so many of my friends had fallen for. "Uh, no. We're at a great point in our relationship and I really hope it'll stay that way."

I nodded as the room turned silent, the cameras all turning off and the air conditioning turning on.

"Miley," Ryan called me over. "Good job, Sweetheart." He hugged the same way my father would if he were here. I grinned, wrapping my arms around him identically. I closed my eyes to keep in the tears before facing down.

"Ry?" he pulled away to look at me. "I think I want to tell everybody why I left."

He searched me for a moment, not answering. Then with caution in his voice he questioned the decision, not wanting me to regret it. "Are you sure?"

I nodded. "The world deserves to know, right? I mean, I just disappeared. They want to know the reason and," I took a deep breath. "I'm ready to tell them."

"You want Seventeen's number?" he asked softly, knowing that I trusted them to cut my words perfectly. They had never let me down before when I told them about Nick and I, about Brandi's cancer, about Nick and I getting back together... They were my tell-all magazine.

I nodded and he pulled out his cell phone, copying it into mine. "Thank you," I said weakly with a smile.

"Show them what you're made of, Mile," he winked, walking away from me.

"Mandy lets him talk to you?" I whipped around, facing Nick. His hair was still perfect from the interview, hairspray keeping it place. His face changed to emotionless though, no longer glowing like it was five minutes ago.

"What does Mandy have to do with anything?"

"You really are _clueless_," he laughed the type of laugh that I knew I wasn't supposed to join in on. "They're _married_."

"Ryan and Mandy?"

"Of course," he rolled his eyes muttering a few words under his breath. "That's why I'm surprised. I mean, Ryan's your best friend and Mandy," he chuckled again. "Mandy _really _doesn't like you."

"Why are you telling me all this?" I snapped.

"I dunno. Just thought you'd like to know," he smirked.

I rolled my eyes beginning to walk away when he quickly kept up with my pace.

"Okay," I suddenly spun around. "Look, last time I checked you didn't like me either. So can you please stop _stalking _me, and leave?"

"_I _don't _like you_?" he asked with humor evident in his voice. For a second I thought that he might deny his dislike and we'd magically be friends. But this was Nick Jonas, and while some people thought he was quiet, he always says exactly what's on his mind. "Oh, believe me, by now, it's so much more. I **hate **you, Miley. I despise you," he paused. "I wish you'd die at this point. But you can't, so I'll just do the next best thing."

"What? Tormenting me?" I yelled.

"Precisely," he gave off one of his lopsided grins that showed he knew he won.

"Stop stalking me," I muttered going into my dressing room, shutting the door, and collapsing into tears on the floor. I shouldn't have come back.

**Dang, Miley is so freaking depressing in this story!! She's SO much fun to write :D so, Nick is once again a total buttcrack in this story (it's a constant pattern in all my stories if you hvent noticed ;) ) & Miley hates LA, & Ryan and Mandy are married. ... interesting. There's some more twists :D then you know... Miley & Nick still have work things out... Hmm, wonder how they'll do that. & now Miley is gonna get interviewed O.o interesting. **

**you know what to do? REVIEW(:**

**ps, yes, i know that this chapter sucked & was a disappointment.  
**


	7. Chapter 7

**I t ' s A l w a y s G o n n a R a i n . . .**

Selena and I sat in my room that night in pure silence. It wasn't awkward or anything, more like comfortable. She was sitting peacefully on my laptop while I messed around with an old Rubix cube that I had found on one of my shelves.

"Okay, why are you so miserable?" she spoke up again.

Again, I gave the same answer. "I don't wanna talk about it, Lena."

"Miley, if you're miserable, I'm miserable."

"I don't want to talk about it."

"Well you need to," she came over my me, wrapping her arms around my body. "What's wrong?" she singsonged.

"I had to interview the Jonas' today," I gave in, adding on the last part quietly almost ashamed. "Nick said he wanted me to die. And that he hates me."

Selena grimaced. "You know he didn't mean it, Mi."

"I don't anymore," I whimpered, playing with my hands.

"He could never hate you," she told me almost reading my mind. She knew that if he wanted me to die that wouldn't help the cutting issue. Sometimes I wondered if she cared about me for me, if she felt bad for me, or if she just felt that it was her job to watch over me. "Why do you care this much anyways?"

I kept quiet giving off a slight shrug, because even I didn't know the answer. I hadn't talked to him in years, yet I felt like he couldn't hate me. That I had to give something to him in order to regain his love. Like I _had _to prove something to him. That I _needed _it.

Realization of dawned on Selena as she stuttered words out. "D-Do you still love him?"

I looked into her eyes, and would have sworn they were browner than the last time I had looked into them. "I used to," I whispered softly.

"But do you still?"

"I don't know him anymore. How could I?"

"Miley," she said sternly. "Are you in love with him?"

I closed my eyes. "I don't believe in love anymore, Selena."

Her jaw dropped. "How could you not believe in love? Jamie and Landon, Allie and Noah, Minnie and Mickey! Hell, you and Nick were in love!"

"I can't believe in it anymore. I know what it's like to be heartbroken and... that much pain can't be possible if there's such a thing as love."

"Watching you made me believe in love," she looked at me determined to somehow make me believe. I hadn't believed in love for a little over three years, though, and she couldn't make me. "You have to believe in love."

"I'm sorry. I really wish I could but... love isn't real to me anymore," I pushed my hair out of the way of my eyes.

Her eyes went to the side as she let out a disappointed breath. "You've been hurt one too many times, Miles, but there is such a thing as love."

"I'll tell you when I believe that," I smiled softly, trying not to ruin it for her.

She sighed knowing that she wouldn't win. I always won our arguments, it didn't matter if i was right or wrong.

"So, I'm telling the world why I left," I brought up casually making her head snap up in curiosity. "Saturday I have an interview scheduled and everything."

"Are you positive? Paparazzi will pick up again, and your sister will be asked about it. Radio's will call and ask for interviews with you again..."

"I know, but I have to," I sighed, getting tears in my eyes. "My old supporters deserve to know."

She nodded, knowing that she couldn't convince me not to. I knew that it would be hard, and I knew that I'd probably regret it after, but I had to let this out. I couldn't hide it. Especially not anymore, because I've been hiding myself for four years. The world deserves to know where I've been.

"You have current supporters, you know?"

I shrugged. "I doubt it."

She shifted so that her arm was wrapped around me in a hug. I felt her start playing with my hair, lifting up strands then letting them bounce down. "You're so much more than you think you are," she whispered in my ear. Her hot breath tickled, sending goosebumps down my arm.

"I think you're wrong," I grinned cheekily as she playfully smacked my arm.

"Well I know I'm right."

* * *

I looked up to the building taking a deep breath. Closing my eyes to silently pray I managed to calm my nerves a little I encouraged myself to go in. I stepped up the steps quickly before I could back down.

Going to the glass door I rang the buzzer. "How may we help you?" the secretary asked in a perky voice that she was trained to use.

"Miley Cyrus for a scheduled interview," I was unsure about this now.

"Of course."

A click was heard and the door unlocked to let me in.

Once me and the interviewer – who was known as Megan – were seated and ready the offer for a food or beverage came. I took a Diet Coke before we started. It started out normally with small questions then gradually got into the more personal ones. I never noticed how much my publicists had helped me out back then.

**(A/N. I'm just gonna make it like they do in the mag.)**

**17: **What made you decide to come back?

**Miley: **Well, I only went to finish collage. **"Lie," I thought. **So, I graduated and came back. I don't think I ever really planned to stay where I was. Just until I got everything straightened out and a good college degree.

**17: **Why did you leave?

**Miley: **There were a lot of personal reasons behind it, but mostly for the fans, and in a way even my friends that I had back then. I know that pretty much all of them are mad at me right now. The truth is I didn't tell any of them where I went, or why. The reason is I was turning into a Britney. I was anorexic, and on top of that I was personally harming myself both emotionally and physically. It wasn't right, yet I couldn't stop. I knew that I needed help, and I needed it fast. Which is the cause for my disappearance. I really didn't want to disappoint anyone back then, because I was disappointing myself already. If the world turned on me, I really don't know what I'd do.

**17: **Why didn't you tell your friends where you were going?

**Miley: **I don't really know. I guess I didn't want them to know. I was embarrassed, and I knew that if they found out they would care. I regret not telling them a lot. It's the one thing that I would redo if I had the chance.

**17: **Who was there for you the most when all of this was happening?

**Miley: **Selena Gomez, most definitely.

**17: **How did you two become friends?

**Miley: **What happened is she called one day, and I'm not going to mention much, but she was crying. I didn't have her number in my phone at all. As much as I would like to say that we were best friends I think that I can admit freely now that we weren't when I was still here. We didn't hate each other, but we were not friends. Anyways I answered it only because I didn't recognize the number. It turned out she was going through a rough time, then I was having a hard time transitioning and I knew I'd made a mistake. We just sorta supported each other. From then on we called each other everyday. She's been by my side through it all and it makes it even better that she's here with me now.

**17: **Do you plan on going back into the business now that you're back?

**Miley: **Not at all. I wanna be an interviewer to start, and, whatever the future brings is what's gonna happen. I wouldn't expect anything special, but I think anything's possible.

The interviewer stared at me for a couple seconds before nodding.

"Thank you for your time, Ms. Cyrus," she said softly before getting up from her seat, leaving me to go no where but an empty house.

Outside the sky was a shade of blue, with two lone clouds. The sun was directly above her. Seeing that it was almost noon I decided to run through a drive-through at McDonald's for lunch before heading home.

The greasy fries no longer intimidated me once I realized that nobody really cared how I looked or exactly how well my size-zero jeans fit me (which they surprisingly weren't tight yet. I figured they would be, especially after the way that I'd been pigging out since I've gotten here.).

I parked into a parking space to eat them, laying my head down on the steering wheel. I can't believe that I just told all of my biggest secrets to a magazine. It was a stupid decision. My ex-(best)friends would read it, then they would have questions... Oh, God, I made a mistake.

In an instant my hand was around my arm, frantically searching for the rubber band before I began pulling, releasing, and repeating a couple dozen times. My breathing was heavy, and perspiration came quickly after that.

_Calm,_ I told myself. _You can't cut. Don't give up. Someone will still love you. You have something to live for... even if you don't know what yet – there has to be something. _I breathed deeply in, filling my lungs before I gained enough control to at least drive home.

It'd be another night of tears tonight...

**...i know that this sucks ＆there was a long wait & everything, but i felt that you guys deserved SOMETHING.**


	8. Chapter 8

**I t ' s A l w a y s G o n n a R a i n . . .**

I looked up as my dad came in, a confused expression on his face as his statement sounded a lot more like a question. "You have a visitor?"

"Who?"

"Demi," he told me, still looking completely disoriented. She used to be my best-friend and now she was on the verge of not being allowed in. She didn't do anything wrong, I did. "Should I-"

"Yeah," I interrupted. She deserved to see me if she came all the way to my house, plus I wanted to know myself what she had to say. I watched him walk out, immediately trying to calm down my frizzy hair.

She came in the doorway seconds later, standing there awkwardly for a minute. We both just looked at each other. She was still gorgeous, I was still me. Plain and boring compared to her.

Then, she did what I didn't expect from anyone. She came over and wrapped her arms around me, giving me the tightest hug I had gotten in awhile, and whispered five words in my ear.

"I'm so glad you're back."

I smiled, happy that at least one person still cared. I was extremely surprised that she wasn't pissed off, but it relieved me to no end. "I'm so sorry I left."

"Forget about it. You're okay, that's all that matters."

I looked up at her. "Why aren't you yelling at me?"

"I can yell at you later if I need to," she pulled me back into our hug, "right now I have four entire years of Miley hugs to catch up on. So get your arms around me."

I giggled, quickly wrapping them around her as tight as I could.

"I see you haven't changed."

"Hey, I missed you too," I smiled. "And your hugs."

"Where did you go?"

The pain in her voice was almost unbearable to hear. I was glad we were having this long hug just so that I didn't have to see her eyes. "University. For a journalism degree."

"Why?"

"I changed, and I had to get away from everything. I didn't want anyone from here to try and help... If I could redo this, I would tell you where I went, though. I'd tell you, Mandy, and the Jonas' if anyone," I prayed she believed me.

"It's okay," she squeezed me a little more. As much as she kept repeating that she forgave me I knew she didn't. There was that glimpse of pain in her eyes. The pain that only I could put there, and only I could take away. I had to take it away.

"Promise me you won't tell anyone if I tell you this? Because you will be one of two people outside my family and school who know," I gave in.

Her head snapped up, a small smile forming on her lips that I trusted her. I knew I'd gained some more forgiveness from that. "Yeah. I promise."

"Not even the Jonas'."

"Okay, I won't."

I bit my lip, pulling up my pant legs a little. I heard her gasp at the scars before I let it fall back down, lifting my shirt so it revealed my stomach that looked the exact same way.

"Oh, my, God. Miley," her hands flew up to her mouth as she sat absolutely still.

"I know, they're ugly," I repeated.

"No, it's just - what happened?"

"You didn't think I went away for nothing did you?" I tried to joke around, but she wasn't having any of it. "I was on the wrong track."

"So..."

"I was depressed, Demi. And I started cutting, but before I knew it I just got addicted. I still am but... I'm fighting it now. I haven't done it in almost two months."

"How often did you used to do it?"

"At least three times a week. Usually more," I told her, looking down. "I didn't want anyone to know, because I was embarrassed, and the last thing I needed was pity. So I just kinda left..."

"I love you so much, Mi. And if anything ever happened to you, I don't know what I would do. You should've seen me these past four years," she told me. "I wasn't okay. I was angry, and didn't know how to talk about anything that was happening... If you leave again, I need you to tell me."

I nodded. "I will."

"How-"

"Miley!" Selena yelled, throwing me an issue of People's.

I looked at the two of them back and forth frantically for a minute before forcing a smile. "Selena, you remember Demi."

She froze, turning a bit. "Demi!" she imitated the way she said my name. We could all tell it was forced though. After their fight a few years back, they didn't talk anymore. After ten years, they threw their entire friendship away and it was never really the same after that.

"Hey, Selena," she was awkward too. Oh boy. "So did you two ever decide who gets to be with Nick?"

"Miley," Selena pointed at me nonchalantly. "She still loves him. But she says she doesn't believe in love, so don't bring it up. We all know she's lying, though."

"Selena," I hissed.

"What?" she asked innocently. "We both know it's true."

I rolled my eyes. "We were having a heart-to-heart. Did you need something?"

"Fine, I'll go talk to Braison," she rolled her eyes. "He _obviously_ has things to fill me in on, anyways."

"Braison will adore your company," I threw the magazine back at her. "Now leave."

She made a face as she walked out, giving me the space I needed with Demi.

"_Selena_?" she asked in disbelief.

I shook my head. "You definitely missed a lot."

"How did she end up getting put in your life and I got pushed to the side?"

"It's not like that," I protested. "I never expected to be friends with her. It all just kinda happened once her and Nick broke up."

"It's fine. It's the past," Demi took a deep breath and I knew it would take her some time to get completely over it all. "So, still fawning over Nick, huh?"

"I don't even know where she got that from. He hates me," I sighed, looking down.

Demi sat on my bed while I followed her. "He doesn't hate you, Miley."

"Are you sure? 'Cause he's made it pretty blatant the past few weeks."

"He's still like my brother," she assured me. "He doesn't wanna get hurt again. You have no idea how you made him feel."

"I have a pretty good idea. Let me guess, kinda like me in 2008."

"You need to move on." She shook her head. "This was four years while you disappeared, no explanation nothing. It's _different_."

"I know, I just - you don't see the way he looks at me. You don't understand how absolutely positive I am that he wants me to go die."

"And what gives you that idea?"

"The fact that he told me to go die," I repeated, smiling a little.

Demi laughed at rolled her eyes. "He's changed too. We've all changed the past four years. I mean, just look at Ryan and Mandy. Would you ever expect them?"

"Yeah."

"Oh, right. You and Mandy-"

I smiled a little. "Just another person who hates me."

"Why don't you just tell them?"

"Because, I don't do pity acts," I told her.

"Actually, I think this would be called explaining yourself for the past four years," she smirked. "Tell them. Before it leaks and they find out by a magazine or something."

I nodded, meeting eyes wither her for the first time in a long time. For the first time in a long time, this place felt like home again. "I will."

I didn't think that'd be such a hard promise to keep.

**laalala. this story is boringgg. review if you'd like! **

**twitter/xwalkingonstars**


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter Nine.**

"So, what was Demi doing here?" Selena asked suspiciously.

"Demi was just here to talk. Nothing happened, chill out," I rolled her eyes at how defensive Selena was being. Did she forget that Demi used to be the only person either of us could trust?

She sat down nodding and looking out the window until I finally gave in, sitting next to her. "What happened?"

"It's _nothing_, I was just wondering why she's here," Selena protested as I crossed my arms.

"Sel, what happened while I was gone? You aren't telling me something."

"It's the past, don't worry about it," she repeated. I sat beside her, crossing my arms. I needed to know.

"Lena."

"I'm not starting anything, okay? Some things are better left unknown. It's not my place to tell."

"You're my best-friend. Everything is your place to tell," I pointed out. I thought she had told me everything that was happening while I was away. Sure, I told her to keep Hollywood gossip out, but I specifically asked about certain people everyday. One of those people were Demi.

"It's just – I can't. Miley, ask her-"

"I'm about to google it. Do you really want me to find out from the internet?" I tested her and she finally gave in.

"A few years ago, a while after you left, there's some things that I left out about Demi when you asked," she admitted. "I just didn't want to hurt you."

"What is it?"

"Demi replaced you, Mi."

"I figured, I mean, someone had to and, no offense, but you aren't that scandalous-"

"Not with Disney," she clarified. "Nick."

I fell silent as I looked at Selena, not clearly seeing her. It was like the world went black. He wouldn't do that me, _Demi _wouldn't do that me. "You're lying."

"You really believe that?" Selena asked, handing me the laptop.

I opened it, googling their names in together and felt a slap in the face seeing the pictures. No. No. _No. _Not Demi too.

"Mi-"

"How could he do this?"

"I-"

"With my best-friend, too. What? Did he that would lure me out of hiding back then?"

"M-"

"Weren't you enough?" I slammed the computer shut, pushing it to the floor. "Why the hell weren't you enough?"

"You've always been the only one who's enough for him," she reminded me of the old days. "And he would have done anything to piss you off, make you come back, and start a love story again."

"He hates me," I muttered. "God damn, I hate him too. He's – Why Demi? Fuck, why couldn't it just be _you_ again? Anyone but Demi."

"I'm sorry, but you need to remember that you're the one that left," she told me gently, and for a few seconds I wanted to knock her out until I realized she was only being honest. "He deserved to move on, and they were both emotionally unstable, trying to figure out what to do without you. They were scared, but it was easier being scared together."

I glared at her, a small grin on my lips, the faintest grin. "Asshole, you weren't supposed to make it sound reasonable."

"I love you, Mi, you know that, but..." she trailed off, filling the space in between while she hugged me.

"It's so hard coming back," I murmured. "Sometimes I wish I would have stayed."

"What's holding you back from leaving?"

"You," I told her. "It's good, finally being able to hang out like this. I just wish we could have done it earlier when I was uncomplicated."

"We wasted a lot of years, but at least you're here now."

"No, but you would've loved me before I was so fucked up. I was the craziest kid out there," I smiled, remembering it a little bit.

She pulled away, giving a disproving look. "Stop it. You're amazing now, okay?_"_

_ "_I'm just saying-"

_"Stop it_," she repeated. "Unless you're going to compliment yourself right now, I don't want to hear it."

I looked around the room, nodding a little. I didn't exactly have any compliments to give myself right now.

"You were doing so good," she crossed her legs. "What's up with you lately?"

"I guess this town just brings back the memories," I mumbled.

The doorbell rang just in time for me to not hear Selena's protests and we both went downstairs. Braison was back at his university now and it was just us in the house. Alone in this house again, just like old times.

I opened the door, backing away a little when I saw it was Nick. "My brother won't answer his phone. He needs to come home."

I gave him a look. Was this some kind of joke or was he just crazy. "Cool?"

"Isn't he here?"

"No. Noah said she was gonna be at your house."

"Shit. Shit, they snuck out. Oh, god. He's so dead. How am I supposed to cover for him? He's almost as stupid as you!" he growled. "Fuck, fuck, fuck."

"Chill out. I'll just call Noah," I shrugged, pulling out my phone as Selena came closer, glaring at Nick for me while I was on the phone.

"She's not gonna answer if Frankie do-"

"Hey, Noe. Where you at?" I gave Nick a told-you-so look.

"I'm with Frankie, I told you."

"You said you'd be at his house, and he apparently said he'd be over here. Where'd you guys go?"

"You swear not to tell?"

"Yeah, virtual pinky promise."

"We went to a club," she told me nervously. "Frankie stop. She's not like Nick. She won't tell anyone... will you?"

"I'm gonna tell Selena, but that's it. Okay, well, you both need to get home now, because Nick's spazzing about how Frankie is so stupid."

"Here, I'll put him on."

"Noah-"

"Hey, Miley. You won't tell, right?"

"No, but you need to come home, okay? Your brother is over here freaking out, and I don't want to deal with him."

"Alright. Fine. Just don't tell."

"I won't. Now speed. How long will it take you guys to get back?"

"Ten minutes."

"Alright, bye, Frank. Tell Noah I told her bye. Love you both."

"Bye, Miles. Thanks for covering. Love you too."

I hung up the phone, looking at Nick and easily lying to his face for once. "They're at the movies. I guess he didn't answer 'cause it was still going on."

"Well is he coming?"

"Yes, he's coming!" I rolled my eyes, dragging Selena to the kitchen.

He rolled his eyes, following us. As much as he didn't want to be in this house with only us he didn't want to be in the house alone either.

"So, how'd you two become friends?" he asked, that judgemental tone in his voice.

Selena looked at me, tilting her head to the side. "Did you hear something?"

"Sel-"

"Phone," she slid the touchscreen across the counter and I looked down at the vibrating device. "I'll answer it."

"I can't trust you to be civil at the moment," I told her, grinning. "Hey, Sarah. What's up, love?"

"Are you with Selena?"

"Yeah, why? She annoying you too?"

"To the bone," she laughed.

"Right? She just doesn't shut up. Actress'. What are ya gonna do?"

"Are you talking about me?" Selena screeched.

I laughed, shaking my head. "What? No. We're talking about Noah."

"Sarah Marie Hering, you better not be talking about me."

"Tell her to shut up."

I giggled a little, glaring at Selena. "She said to shut the fuck up."

"I did not! You tell her what I said right now, whore. I don't use that language."

I rolled my eyes, pulling the phone away again. "She said it a little more sugar coated than that."

"Anyway, enough of her. She isn't special," she changed topics. "How are you, Mile?"

I looked down at my fingers a little. "I'm okay."

"You lying to me?"

"No."

She paused, trying to figure out how to word it. "You haven't tried again, have you?"

"Not yet," I fiddled with the ring I was wearing. "It's hard, though."

"Please, Miley," she begged, and I pictured that face she always gave me that stopped me for days. That face would always haunt me. "Wait, you're with Nick right now?"

"What? How-"

"Selena told me, why the hell is he there?"

"Selena!" I shot her a look.

"Hey, what's up? I got bored of only hearing half of the conversation," she gave me a cute little half smile. I shook my head.

"You want to talk to her?"

"Uh, yeah. That's what I said ten minutes ago," she walked over grabbing the phone from me.

"Just remember who actually knew she had a boyfriend, and who didn't find out 'til three months later," I bragged again about Sarah's relationship with my brother.

"Sarah, I am infuriated with you," Selena laughed, acting like she was fifteen all over again.

I finally looked at Nick only to see him staring at me. "You want something to drink?"

"I'm good. Where's my brother?"

"Driving home."

"Yeah, she's fine," I heard Selena whispered.

"God, how could you let them go out?" he asked me. As if it was all my fault. But I didn't want to argue. I couldn't take the insults when they came out of his mouth.

"I'm sorry," I whispered.

"Here, Mi, Sarah wants to talk to you privately... It's supposedly gonna be deep," Selena handed the phone to me and I nodded, getting the hint that I should go upstairs.

I took it, putting it to my ear. "Hold on. I wanna eavesdrop," I whispered, stopping at the top of the stairs.

"Miley, maybe you should-"

The phone was already away from ear as I stood against the wall.

"Lay off her," Selena ordered Nick.

"Did you just speak to me?" He asked in a way that was supposed to be intimidating... I would have been intimidated.

"_Lay_ off her," She hissed.

"I know Miley, okay? She-"

"No," she told him, fiercely. "No, you don't know her, and you don't know how much she can take. Fuck off, or I swear to God I will make your life a living hell."

"So, what? You two are friends now? How did that even _happen_?"

"She's my best-friend," Selena corrected him immediately. "And if you mess with her, you're messing with me, and she may not fight back, but I will."

"Well, you two have certainly switched positions."

I sighed, getting up and going into Braison's room.

"You okay?" Sarah asked.

"I'm fine."

"It's been hard, huh?"

She didn't understand. "Too hard. I think I'll be visiting for awhile soon."

"Good. You should. Lord knows we all miss you."

I smiled, going back downstairs. "I miss you too. It's so weird being here again."

"Which is why you should come visit," Sarah hinted. "Maybe be bring some people?"

"I'm thinking I'll bring Trace," I suggested.

She laughed. "I was thinking more your other brother."

"Ew, no. I think he has a girlfriend."

She sighed. "Darn. That's unfortunate."

"What can I say? He's a heartthrob."

"Cool, so you're bringing him?"

"Eh, yeah. I guess. Maybe I'll even bring Selena."

"I'm not sure if I can handle her."

"Right? Damn American."

"Miley!" Selena scolded.

"I think she wants to join the club."

"Aren't _you_ an American?"

"Only legally. Not in my heart. If we ever go to war with you, I'm totally on your side," I told her, laughing.

"_Miley_!" Selena yelled again.

"Mi, I'm back!" Noah called.

"I gotta go, Sare. I'll text you."

"Kay, bye, Miles. Love you. I'll see you soon."

"Bye," I sighed, not wanting to hang up. "Love you too."

"Frankie, let's go," Nick sighed, eying me before he left.

Noah walked over to me nervously and I knew she was somewhat scared of what my reaction to the news of her newest hobby.

"Clubbing, huh?"

She nodded.

"No paparazzi caught you?" I rose an eyebrow. She shook her head a little as Selena stifled a laugh. "Hmph. I'm impressed, kid."

"Why? 'Cause I can sneak around better than you? Everyone knew that," she smirked. "Right, Sel?"

"We've known for ages," she muttered.

"Did you tell Nick?"

"Nope. I told him you guys were at the movies, that's why he didn't answer."

"Fuck, I owe you," she smiled. "Guess who we saw there."

"Who?"

"Demi. We were avoiding her like, all night then she saw us at the end. You didn't tell me she knew about the cutting."

"She knows about the cutting?" Selena asked me, hurt.

"Yeah, I-I told her."

She nodded, but I knew she was upset with that decision.

"_You_," I pointed to Noah. "You talked to me too. How come you never thought to tell me Demi and Nick were dating?"

Noah just shrugged. "I didn't want you to go slice yourself if you found out."

"Noah," Selena hissed, and suddenly I knew she kept it away from me for the same reason.

"What? Did you want me lie to her? That's your job."

"You both should have told me," I murmured, pulling them out of their argument. They looked at each other, both of them worried, trying to figure out what to do with the crazy girl that they both got stuck with.

"I just wanna be alone, guys."

"Miley-"

"I'm fine," I told them, going up to my room. "You can check for cuts in the morning, do whatever the fuck you both wanna do. I just need to be alone for awhile."

They nodded, obviously not agreeing but not having much of a choice. Even I didn't know what I was going to do while I was alone. I just wanted to know what my life was coming to.


End file.
